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A Deeper Understanding

Postby chefjoe » Sep Fri 13, 2019 4:21 pm

I haven’t been around of late, due to many issues. Now, before I get into those. Some specifics, please no awes or feeling sorry for me, as the whole point of this is really just a way for me to let you all know how very much I care for you, and how very much you mean to me as  true friends even though we’ve never actually met. Ok, so this year I turned 60 and God only knows what a blessing that is to me, God knows, given  my early drug use throughout the late 60’s 70’s, along with 20 years of military life,  well lets just say I’m lucky to still be here, as I’ve lost all the wonderful people who’ve ever meant anything to me,  the last of which was my childhood best friend.
I entered My military life in late 76 at the age of 16, hehe yeah 16, despite listening to my father who warned me to “stay the hell away from the Infantry”, I joined as a cook, and choose to go to Hawaii as my station of choice. Well, little did I know I was placed in a special forces unit, and much of what I did my first 3 yrs, had little to do with actual cooking, and that’s about all I can say about  my first 2 1/2 yrs, as a reward for my service I was made a lifeguard and posted on Wikiki Beach for my last 6 months and promoted to Sgt. Now to the nuts and bolts, I was barely 19 years old when I was given my first command of soldiers and equipment ranging from 6 to 45 or so soldiers and equipment and buildings in excess of over millions worth in dollars, I was responsible for training, health and welfare of such, while in support of anywhere from 150 to 5,000 soldiers, all in support of rapid deployment Infantry units and divisions. And God forbid I became one of the best in my field, surprising even myself. I did and was involved in combat operations more than I care to remember, and never lost a single soldier, but in honesty sacrificed more of myself than I probably should have. God knows I had many peers that sacrificed seemingly nothing more than a good appearance, but did just fine,  some better than me. Nothing made me more proud, than seeing and listening to the remarks and knowing the pride my soldiers all carried with and among themselves knowing full well their accomplishments. On a personal note I was selected “All Army” and “All European” in 92 and 94 Culinary Competitions, I also received My Certification as an Executive Chef in 95, the same year I retired from active duty. I then embarked upon my hardest mission to become a respected chef as a civilian, but that’s a long other story, maybe I’ll share in the future.

So why the rambling on, well I became disabled in 2008 from injuries sustained during my service, and have not been able to work since, at first I could still do simple housework, prepare family meals, and even yard work. That all ended in 2011 after a series of bad falls, and since could do very little, although I still try, due to tremors and numbness in my hands and legs from the knees down however, I’m pretty much left in bed now. I’m Truly sorry for popping in and out of late, but my last  cover took me over a month to finish, and quite honestly my inspiration is lacking.
To be honest, with all I used to be and do, I now feel  empty and worthless and know that I’m simply dying inside. So, I’m struggling right now, and feel I need to let you all know just how much I appreciate you, and respect you and yes, love you. As the friends you are to me. Thank you, Thank You, Thank you for all your support over the years. I just don’t want any of you not to know this, in case anything does happen causing me a longer disappearance than I’d like. Hehe, man my shrink is gonna shit the next time we speak.

Anyway, thanks to  you, and know that I’m not completely giving up, just very very tired.

Chef Joe (Nick)

PS - Maybe a few requests, but add some newer titles so I can find better images hehe.
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby ctaulbee » Sep Fri 13, 2019 5:06 pm

Well glad you still have a positive attitude and are still hanging in there.

We are happy to see you still milling about buddy.

I'll see if I can find a few newer titles for you then.


:D
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby Bunny Dojo » Sep Fri 13, 2019 5:41 pm

It sounds like any time you need a break from Photoshop you can switch over to a writing program and will have plenty of material for getting a fascinating story down on paper!
Then, turn the book into a movie.  Then, design the movie poster.   8)

You're not only one of the most unique designers on here, you're also one of the most unique people.  Whether to upload a new cover or to make a quick post in the forum, it's good news when your name is in the "Who is online" box.
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby Wrench » Sep Fri 13, 2019 6:24 pm

I have a good idea as to some of what you are going through. I was in Nam in the early 70's and have agent orange.
Some days it's very hard for me to breath.
Just hang in there chefie and live one day at a time not thinking about tomorrow.
Just remember tomorrow never comes.
;)
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby chefjoe » Sep Fri 13, 2019 7:37 pm

Thanks  for understanding, Wrench, Thank You so much for your service, in my book you guys were the real heroes out there. I have a brother who suffers the same, took VA nearly 40 years to give him so called treatment, you hang in there as well my friend. And Bunny you've always had kind things to say to me, considering I'm nowhere near the designer you've been, can't thank you enough for that!
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby chouette » Sep Fri 13, 2019 9:34 pm

Wow, quite the story there Chef! I have to admit, I was quite surprised when I saw everything you wrote. Normally I never read anything that is longer than 8-10 lines, hate reading, lol - But no worries, I read it all. Very interesting story, thanks for sharing my friend!

:cutesmile
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby ctaulbee » Sep Sat 14, 2019 12:46 am

Here is some new ones to get you going.

Crawl (2019)
Dead Don't Die, The (2019)
Polaroid (2019)


Oh and there is a new season of American Horror Story: 1984 - Season 9 too.

They are going "campy 80's horror" theme this season, so that opens up a lot of scope to explore fun things on a cover.
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby bankska22 » Sep Sat 14, 2019 7:06 am

Totally understand you my friend. I was away quite a bit dealing with stuff and these fine people here were a reason for me to keep fighting so stay strong my friend and keep up the good fight. We need you. Thanks for sharing this Nick and thank you for your service. Just wish it was the Navy. Ha Ha

God Bless you Brother!
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby chefjoe » Sep Sat 14, 2019 12:32 pm

Thanks bankska,  not to worry had another brother served in the Navy, so it's all good, I did some work with the navy, only once though, great group of fellas. I knew we had some vets here, that's cool.
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby chefjoe » Sep Sat 14, 2019 12:35 pm

ctaulbee wrote:Here is some new ones to get you going.

Crawl (2019)
Dead Don't Die, The (2019)
Polaroid (2019)


Oh and there is a new season of American Horror Story: 1984 - Season 9 too.

They are going "campy 80's horror" theme this season, so that opens up a lot of scope to explore fun things on a cover.


Got em! thanks so much my friend for everything you do!
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby Sarge » Sep Sat 14, 2019 6:24 pm

I know the feeling Chefjoe, I served in Nam also, went thought hell for 6 years, lost allot of good friends and survived a C-130 crash, the horrors of war do haunt us.
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Re: A Deeper Understanding

Postby chefjoe » Sep Sat 14, 2019 8:40 pm

hear, hear. Thank You for your service!
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