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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Jan Thu 26, 2017 8:39 pm

A farmer named Clyde had a car accident. In court, the trucking company’s fancy hot shot lawyer, was questioning Clyde.

“Didn’t you say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine,’?” asked the lawyer.

Clyde responded, “Well, I’ll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite cow, Bessie, into the…”

“I didn’t ask for any details”, the lawyer interrupted. “Just answer the question, please. Did you, or did you not say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine!’?”

Clyde said, “Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road….”

The lawyer interrupted again and said, “Your Honor, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question.”

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Clyde’s answer and said to the lawyer, “I’d like to hear what he has to say about his favorite cow, Bessie”.

Clyde thanked the Judge and proceeded. “Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite cow, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting, real bad and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans. Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her fatal condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Then the Patrolman came across the road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said,
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“How are you feeling?”

“Now tell me, what would YOU say!?”
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Feb Fri 03, 2017 7:58 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Feb Thu 23, 2017 1:59 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Wed 08, 2017 1:46 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Sat 11, 2017 9:59 am

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Wed 15, 2017 11:45 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Wed 15, 2017 11:54 pm

Mr. Jones recipe... :)
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Mon 20, 2017 1:13 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Mon 20, 2017 5:52 pm

:hehe:
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Tue 21, 2017 11:46 am

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Re: The Fog

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Wed 22, 2017 6:35 pm

Look mom no hands!  8)
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Wed 22, 2017 7:10 pm

Or, that famous Texan quote, "Watch THIS... Hold my beer!"
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Mar Mon 27, 2017 11:44 am

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Mon 03, 2017 3:16 pm

As a child, I always had a fear of someone under the bed at night.
So I went to a shrink and told him: I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under it. I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy.”
"Just put yourself in my hands for one year," said the shrink.
"Come talk to me three times a week and we should be able to get rid of those fears.”
“How much do you charge?”

“One hundred fifty dollars per visit,” replied the doctor.
“I'll sleep on it,” I said.
Six months later the doctor met me on the street.
“Why didn't you come to see me about those fears you were having?” he asked.
“Well, $150 a visit, three times a week for a year, is $23,400.00. A bartender cured me for $10.00. I was so happy to have saved all that money that I went and bought a new pickup truck.”
“Is that so?” With a bit of an attitude he said, “and how, may I ask, did a bartender cure you?”
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“He told me to cut the legs off the bed. Ain't nobody under there now.”
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Mon 10, 2017 12:55 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Thu 13, 2017 6:47 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Sun 16, 2017 2:49 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Jazzy » Apr Sun 16, 2017 3:03 pm

:giggle:
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Wed 19, 2017 7:42 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby VincentLupo » Apr Wed 19, 2017 8:50 pm

Mine too.
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Thu 20, 2017 8:04 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby Jazzy » Apr Thu 20, 2017 8:21 pm

Yup... watch
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Re: The Fog

Postby 2getted » Apr Thu 20, 2017 11:31 pm

I don't think I would have noticed until the damage started to happen. But if I had noticed it I would have automatically said something, then thought later that maybe I should have just watched the show instead. Sometimes the best teacher is experience.
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Re: The Fog

Postby Fogdude » Apr Sun 23, 2017 7:37 pm

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Re: The Fog

Postby ctaulbee » Apr Sun 23, 2017 7:50 pm

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