Current Contest Banner


EFX Subscriptions

The Funhouse

Jokes, Pictures, Stories and other funny stuff to amuse and entertain.

Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Wed 19, 2014 11:43 pm

Just the funny ones folks  :-S

Why did the blonde get excited after finishing her puzzle in 6 months?

Spoiler Block
The box said 2-4 years!
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby kylumi » Mar Thu 20, 2014 2:43 am

Surely she must have been a very bright girl then? :minion12:
Image
User avatar
kylumi
Lifetime Achievement
Keep Calm, I'm British!
Posts: 4952
Topics: 191
CoverArt: 312
Resources: 6
Joined: December 6, 2005
Medals: 28
2016 September Cover Contest (1)COTM April 2016 (1)2016 February Label Contest (1)COTM 2015 November (1)
2015 November Cover Contest (1)COTM 2015 October (1)2015 October Cover Contest (1)2015 September Cover Contest (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby TheDude » Mar Thu 20, 2014 5:13 am

A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse, unassisted, and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle.

In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway.

The horse gallops along, seemingly impervious to its slipping rider.Finally, giving up her frail grip, the blonde attempts to leap away from the horse and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup, she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves. As her head is struck against the ground over and over. As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when to her great fortune... Frank, the Walmart greeter, sees her dilemma and unplugs the horse.
User avatar
TheDude
Paragon Member
I'm the Dude, man.
Posts: 301
Topics: 9
CoverArt: 34
Resources: 4
Joined: November 26, 2012
Medals: 2
QWAZY Award 2014 (1)EFX Comedian 2013 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby jediaj3001 » Mar Thu 20, 2014 6:21 am

Blonde turns to a friend - 'I am going to be the first woman to land on the sun!'

Friend says, 'Won't that be to hot?'

Spoiler Block
Blonde - 'Nahhh - I'll go at night!'



.....and.....


Image

Katie Price... nuff said.
Image
User avatar
jediaj3001
Veteran Member
Minions Rule!
Posts: 612
Topics: 44
CoverArt: 5
Resources: 1
Joined: July 24, 2013
Occupation: Jedi Master
Location: Here, there... sometimes everywhere

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby kylumi » Mar Thu 20, 2014 8:50 am

Funny stuff guys..... :-O  :-$
Image
User avatar
kylumi
Lifetime Achievement
Keep Calm, I'm British!
Posts: 4952
Topics: 191
CoverArt: 312
Resources: 6
Joined: December 6, 2005
Medals: 28
2016 September Cover Contest (1)COTM April 2016 (1)2016 February Label Contest (1)COTM 2015 November (1)
2015 November Cover Contest (1)COTM 2015 October (1)2015 October Cover Contest (1)2015 September Cover Contest (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby Lucan63 » Mar Thu 20, 2014 3:01 pm

Frank saves the day!  lmao   8-)
Image
User avatar
Lucan63
Root Administrator
Biker Admin
Posts: 2040
Topics: 172
CoverArt: 187
Joined: November 17, 2005
Occupation: Self-Employed and Automotive Care Center Service Manager at Walmart
Location: US

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby Pico » Mar Thu 20, 2014 3:38 pm

A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.

"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony.
She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams and so it goes on, everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette, are you?"

She says, "No, I'm really a blonde."

"I thought so," he says. "Your finger is broken."
User avatar
Pico
Elite Member
Live The Life You've Imagined.
Posts: 4268
Topics: 596
CoverArt: 66
Resources: 276
Joined: October 11, 2013
Location: Europe
Medals: 2
2014 Sci-Fi Cover Comp (1)2013 Christmas Cover Comp (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Thu 20, 2014 5:34 pm

Why did God create blondes?

Spoiler Block
Because pets can't bring beer from the fridge.

Why did God create brunettes?

Spoiler Block
Because the blondes couldn't either.
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby bankska22 » Mar Sat 22, 2014 3:15 am

:-O  :-O  :-O  :-O  :-O  :-O  :-O
Image
User avatar
bankska22
Moderator
#1 Dallas Cowboy's Fan!
Posts: 5989
Topics: 957
CoverArt: 1191
Resources: 97
Joined: February 20, 2011
Medals: 6
EFX 5K Post Club (1)2019 June Cover Contest (1)COTM March 2019 (1)2014 Action Label Design Comp (1)
2014 Design Merit Contest (1)2012 Summer Blockbuster Cover (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby chefjoe » Mar Sun 23, 2014 11:19 am

Don't know how to do the cool spoiler stuff so being that the wife is blonde, here mine...


Why don't blondes like pickles?  
Spoiler Block
Their heads get stuck in the jar.

Whats do you call a blonde who dyes her hair to brunette?  
Spoiler Block
Artificial Intelligence.
Image
User avatar
chefjoe
Exclusive Design Pro
Keep Calm I'm On A Mac
Posts: 1446
Topics: 190
CoverArt: 1806
Joined: December 31, 2007
Occupation: Former Executive Chef
Location: Georgia, USA
Medals: 6
25,000 Downloads (1)COTM March 2018 (1)Horror Master (1)16th Place Battle Royal 4 (1)
Showdown Chefjoe def RRJR84 (1)COTM July 2011 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby bankska22 » Mar Sun 23, 2014 11:13 pm

LOL :-O  :-O  :-O
Image
User avatar
bankska22
Moderator
#1 Dallas Cowboy's Fan!
Posts: 5989
Topics: 957
CoverArt: 1191
Resources: 97
Joined: February 20, 2011
Medals: 6
EFX 5K Post Club (1)2019 June Cover Contest (1)COTM March 2019 (1)2014 Action Label Design Comp (1)
2014 Design Merit Contest (1)2012 Summer Blockbuster Cover (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby bankska22 » Mar Sun 23, 2014 11:14 pm

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
Spoiler Block
A: The blonde works in the dark!
Image
User avatar
bankska22
Moderator
#1 Dallas Cowboy's Fan!
Posts: 5989
Topics: 957
CoverArt: 1191
Resources: 97
Joined: February 20, 2011
Medals: 6
EFX 5K Post Club (1)2019 June Cover Contest (1)COTM March 2019 (1)2014 Action Label Design Comp (1)
2014 Design Merit Contest (1)2012 Summer Blockbuster Cover (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby Wrench » Mar Mon 24, 2014 1:09 am

How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
Spoiler Block
The joystick is wet.


What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
Spoiler Block
Her ankles.
Click on Image Below To View My Covers Image

Image
User avatar
Wrench
EFX Comp Organizer
If It's Not Broke I'll Break It
Posts: 6407
Topics: 856
CoverArt: 1627
Resources: 654
Joined: July 24, 2012
Occupation: Retired ASE Auto Tech, and Annoy Chewie
Location: Under the Hood of a Car
Medals: 13
EFX 5K Post Club (1)Wrench 3000 (1)Wrench 2500 (1)Wrench 2000 (1)
Wrench 1500 (1)2017 March Label Contest (1)Wrench 1000 (1)EFX ShoutBox Champ 2016 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby bankska22 » Mar Mon 24, 2014 2:20 am

:-O  :-O  :-O
Image
User avatar
bankska22
Moderator
#1 Dallas Cowboy's Fan!
Posts: 5989
Topics: 957
CoverArt: 1191
Resources: 97
Joined: February 20, 2011
Medals: 6
EFX 5K Post Club (1)2019 June Cover Contest (1)COTM March 2019 (1)2014 Action Label Design Comp (1)
2014 Design Merit Contest (1)2012 Summer Blockbuster Cover (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby kylumi » Mar Mon 24, 2014 11:11 am

What does a blonde do first thing in the morning?

Spoiler Block
Walks Home


What is a blonde's favorite nursery rhyme?

Spoiler Block
Humpme Dumpme!
Image
User avatar
kylumi
Lifetime Achievement
Keep Calm, I'm British!
Posts: 4952
Topics: 191
CoverArt: 312
Resources: 6
Joined: December 6, 2005
Medals: 28
2016 September Cover Contest (1)COTM April 2016 (1)2016 February Label Contest (1)COTM 2015 November (1)
2015 November Cover Contest (1)COTM 2015 October (1)2015 October Cover Contest (1)2015 September Cover Contest (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Mon 24, 2014 8:40 pm

Did you hear about the blondes who froze to death at the drive-in?
Spoiler Block
They went to see "Closed for the Winter".

What do you call a blonde with a 50 I.Q.?
Spoiler Block
Gifted.
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby Wrench » Mar Tue 25, 2014 12:14 am

What does a blonde do when her laptop computer freezes?
Spoiler Block
She sticks it in the microwave!


Why was the blonde upset when she got her Driver's License?
Spoiler Block
Because she got an "F" in sex.
Click on Image Below To View My Covers Image

Image
User avatar
Wrench
EFX Comp Organizer
If It's Not Broke I'll Break It
Posts: 6407
Topics: 856
CoverArt: 1627
Resources: 654
Joined: July 24, 2012
Occupation: Retired ASE Auto Tech, and Annoy Chewie
Location: Under the Hood of a Car
Medals: 13
EFX 5K Post Club (1)Wrench 3000 (1)Wrench 2500 (1)Wrench 2000 (1)
Wrench 1500 (1)2017 March Label Contest (1)Wrench 1000 (1)EFX ShoutBox Champ 2016 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby bankska22 » Mar Tue 25, 2014 12:57 am

LOL :-O
Image
User avatar
bankska22
Moderator
#1 Dallas Cowboy's Fan!
Posts: 5989
Topics: 957
CoverArt: 1191
Resources: 97
Joined: February 20, 2011
Medals: 6
EFX 5K Post Club (1)2019 June Cover Contest (1)COTM March 2019 (1)2014 Action Label Design Comp (1)
2014 Design Merit Contest (1)2012 Summer Blockbuster Cover (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Tue 25, 2014 7:44 am

Q: Why do blondes wear underwear?
Spoiler Block
A: To keep their ankles warm.
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby kylumi » Mar Tue 25, 2014 11:16 am

Don't you just love th :-$ em :-O
Image
User avatar
kylumi
Lifetime Achievement
Keep Calm, I'm British!
Posts: 4952
Topics: 191
CoverArt: 312
Resources: 6
Joined: December 6, 2005
Medals: 28
2016 September Cover Contest (1)COTM April 2016 (1)2016 February Label Contest (1)COTM 2015 November (1)
2015 November Cover Contest (1)COTM 2015 October (1)2015 October Cover Contest (1)2015 September Cover Contest (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Tue 25, 2014 9:09 pm

kylumi wrote:Don't you just love th :-$ em :-O


:timon:   I do, I do, I do
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Mar Thu 27, 2014 4:11 am

Image
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ShaiEmma » Apr Sat 12, 2014 4:24 pm

i wanna be a blonde too...  :-O
The King is always lucky...
User avatar
ShaiEmma
Valued Member
Posts: 46
Topics: 6
CoverArt: 2
Joined: February 24, 2012

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby ctaulbee » Apr Sat 12, 2014 4:51 pm

shai_emma wrote:i wanna be a blonde too...  :-O


Well of course you do  :-)
Image
Image
You can find all my covers by clicking the spine image, if you download any please leave a comment or smiley, thanks
User avatar
ctaulbee
Super Administrator
Hand Me The Sledgehammer... I'll Fix It!
Topic author
Posts: 14491
Topics: 973
CoverArt: 2366
Resources: 11530
Joined: November 8, 2005
Occupation: The Devil's Hand
Location: Realm of Nightmares
Medals: 39
COTM August 2019 (1)COTM June 2019 (1)COTM April 2019 (1)COTM November 2018 (1)
COTM September 2018 (1)2018 September Cover Contest (1)2018 July Cover Contest (1)COTM June 2018 (1)

Re: Blonde Jokes

Postby Wrench » Apr Sat 12, 2014 7:26 pm

That will teacher her to want to be a blonde. Don't you just :-@ PS :-~ the blonde :-|
Click on Image Below To View My Covers Image

Image
User avatar
Wrench
EFX Comp Organizer
If It's Not Broke I'll Break It
Posts: 6407
Topics: 856
CoverArt: 1627
Resources: 654
Joined: July 24, 2012
Occupation: Retired ASE Auto Tech, and Annoy Chewie
Location: Under the Hood of a Car
Medals: 13
EFX 5K Post Club (1)Wrench 3000 (1)Wrench 2500 (1)Wrench 2000 (1)
Wrench 1500 (1)2017 March Label Contest (1)Wrench 1000 (1)EFX ShoutBox Champ 2016 (1)

Next

  • Similar topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post

Return to The Funhouse



Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest


EFX Subscriptions